coming to the end of the line

In 17 days, the world will be saying goodbye to the year of 2012.

A year full of pride, humility, growth, change.

Together, we will all welcome 2013 as a New Year with new opportunities and hopeful better lives.

For me, right now, it’s fun to look back and see how far I have come.  To observe where I might still be the same girl I was a year ago, in contrast to the woman I’m becoming each day since.

I could easily confess this year has not been easy, nor has it gone as I predicted – but I never did try to predict what would happen.  In fact, last year, I was little unwelcoming toward the year 2012 and with little to no joy when the clock hit midnight.  I was more unhappy about life than I was willing to admit.  Loneliness broke my inner person and left me hollow.

I will always be surprised by how true loneliness can be even amongst family.

Yet, despite the brokenness this world contains, I find life moves on and it changes.  I don’t stay the same, as you don’t stay the same.  The bitter taste of feeling left out or alone or lost or hurt or confuse eventually slowly washes away.  Things come to pass and life continues.

And then, somehow, we become wiser and learn to express words of direction to others.

I suppose, the real meaning to this post is: 2013 is coming and there’s no stopping it.  Those low moments of 2012 are almost over, even if they don’t disappear right after the clock hits midnight.  They may, of course stay with you a little longer because they don’t go with the human timeline.

I have a few weeks to decide about my return to America.  Time to decide on which city, state and job.  At least, those will be 2013’s firm decisions – in the end, my choices will not be remembered in 2012 and that makes me happy.  You see, 2012 already has enough weight on its shoulders.


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