the one in which christi gives an honest update about her life

I warn you, this may be all over the place – I haven’t done this in a while.

Thanksgiving Day – a day actually focused around being thankful.

A holiday that should, by all means, be a Christian holiday but isn’t.  It’s a national holiday, no strings attached.  One that exclusively reminds people to be thankful.  Yes, Black Friday likes to take the glory, but still the holiday does challenge people to look at the good in their lives.

It’s a neutral holiday.  One in which people can celebrate without arguing by involving religion.  Speculating and humiliating the name of Christ is harder – along with idealizing traditions over His name.

I know we have the food, the sweets, the football but those are only daily idols enhanced.  However, this post isn’t about idols and faith – it’s about being thankful.

Tonight, I had the privilege of talking to dear friend of mine.  Her name is Anna and it’s so neat to see how much our friendship has grown.  My friendship with her just encourages me.  We met before I attended the same University with her and then we eventually had a class together.  Anna and I had small talk sessions then.  If you would have asked me where I’d seen our relationship go, I never would have guessed we’d be this close.  She’s like a sister.

Therefore, I’m thankful for friends.  Friends with whom I do not have to work for their love.

As I spoke with her, I realized something.

These past months have not been easy.  I do not take change easy and it’s been difficult readjusting.  Learning that with the end of College years I lost a sense of my identity.  I came home and while away, I’d grown into this strong and confident woman, but as I was thrust back into my childhood culture it came as a slow and quick shock.  For the past months, I’ve been feeling so out-of-place and unsure as to how to find my place.  I’m still searching.

In a sense, I had a hit of culture shock.  One I did not expect.

Some days have been incredibly hard and others God has blesses me with joy.  Recently, I’m come to be so thankful for children.  They’ve really been showing me God’s love.  Especially, these two little girls.  Who are the same age, very similar but completely different.  They hug me and kiss me.  Get so excited to see me.  Want to play with me even though I lack the ambition or energy to do anything with them sometimes.

Also there are three African siblings, two girls and a boy.  Each Sunday they challenge me to the core.  They drain me from every ounce of energy, but at the end I don’t care how tired I feel.  In a sense, I just want them to feel safe and loved.  In past Sundays, I’ve been bad with patience and loving them well, but the thing is – they still love me.

The little boy, he’s three.  I upset him all the time because he always wants to play on the computers and I say no.  He’s stubborn and I tell him he must listen to me.  He gets upset and cries, but even though he isn’t happy I won’t let him do what he wants, he still loves me.  Says he wants to marry me.

The children are breathing life into me.  They are reminding me where I need to draw from.  They are teaching me patience and they are helping grow to love deeper and without conditions.

All five of them are bring joy into my life.


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