You know what I love? I’ll tell you. I love sitting in Barnes & Noble with no expectation of my time.
What a beautiful and fruitful day. I spent four hours in – well, basically – silence today. (Now, I did spent a minimum time praying out loud at first and then said a few hello’s, but the majority was spent in silence.) For 2:30 hours I was good. God and I were on the same page. I even experience a cool little guidance moment with Him — amazing. However, the last 1:30 I just checked out.
A snap happened and I was out of my restless pursuit of His presence. I knew He was all around, so why keep trying to press in? I think that was my conclusion. And you know what? I think it’s okay. I told Him, I said, “God. I’m tired of this. I’m ready to be done with this 4 hour silence thing. Really. Please make my alarm go off.”
The alarm didn’t go off when I wanted it. Soooo, the silence continued and continued.
Even though my heart was picking up a restless spirit, I still love that I stayed silent. I tried my hardest and well, left the park earlier than I should (but the silence had remained!). I cherish this morning; oh my goodness, so much. I felt bound by the time of my silent retreat — but it was beautiful. The day was beautiful. The sun was beautiful. My heart feels beautiful.
I realized something pretty cool, for me. My heart yearns – deeply yearns! – for a simple life. A life not full of chaos and business, but SIMPLENESS. That’s what I want. A genuine simple life, with a simple life. SO. What did I realized? Silence simplifies life. Time slows down like crazy.
Seriously. I compared my time spent (for 4 hours) on the computer, to my 4 hours of silence — and well, everything slowed down. I enjoyed just soaking up the sun. My mind slowed. Thoughts did stream thought my oh so thoughtful beautiful mind, but I wasn’t bombarded by my usual non-stopping thoughtful mind. It was just beautiful. I’m not going to lie, I did get tired and bored of doing nothing. But, in the mist of my boredom of the silence, I felt peace. My life had been simplified.