Is it pity I see in their eyes? Oh judgment. How easy it is to judge.
I am unworthy to even call on Your name, but I am tired. So very tired Father of pushing and shoving. Of trying to hold on, but seeing “the greener side.” Hah! There is no greener side better than Yours. Yet, each time something shiny appears I fall for it. Again and again. I’m tired. So tired of chasing wasteful things.
Temptation, sin. Ugh! I hate it. Oh Lord, I’m tired. So very tired of turning away. Desiring the tangible instead of You. Telling others to trust You, yet secretly I don’t. What a fake I am. But I’m not! I love You, I long for You. At the end of the day, I would hate to miss out on anything from You. I want to receive all You give to others. I want Your love, Your gaze. I want all of You, for me.
I am tired. So very tired of sin. Of how it plagues my soul daily. Will You fully and fill this sad empty heart of mine? Will You spring living waters in it to rejoice and be glad in You? Lord, in my sorrow I want to still feel joy in Your name.
Revive my heart of Lover of my soul.